Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Crawlspace (2012)

Crawlspace (2012) - An Australian Army extraction team is sent to retrieve a group of scientists after a joint U.S. military/Autralian military research compound in the outback is compromised.  What they find there may be more than their training has prepared them for.

Even before I saw the cover tagline below, I knew this was a poor-man's knockoff of Aliens about fifteen minutes into the picture.  The tight corridors and air ducts, motion detecting equipment, and the snarky, grab-assing squad-mates kinda gave it away.  The fact that it is actually about telepathic human experiments does not detract from that feeling.

In general, I am a fan of movies where your group of heroes is trapped in a confined environment and

Monday, March 30, 2015

The Magic of Belle Isle (2012)

The Magic of Belle Isle (2012) - Morgan Freeman (The Shawshank Redemption) is Monte Wildhorn, a drunken novelist whose writing has reached a screeching halt.  He finds himself living in the picturesque seasonal town of Belle Isle next to a soon-to-be single mother of three girls, Charlotte O'Neil as played by Virginia Madsen (Candyman).  If it is possible to portray a

Friday, March 27, 2015

Knit 2 Together

Knit 2 Together by Tracey Ullman and Mel Clark is the first knitting book I bought back in 2007 when I got back into knitting after Hurricane Katrina.  We'd finally settled into a new home and I'd caught the bug again when I wanted to brighten up a drab couch with a nice colorful afghan.  After finishing the afghan, I went casting about for more fun projects and came across this book.

Tracey Ullman (Tracey Takes On...) actress, comedienne, and fledgling knitter herself shares her knitting experiences along with colorful anecdotes about her life growing up.  While there are a few patterns I would not consider making, the stories in this book are hilarious and more than make up for the occasional oddball pattern.

If you like knitting books that combine stories and knitting tips in the style of the Mason-Dixon knitting series, or if you're a fan of Tracey's comedic work, you'll enjoy this book.

Thursday, March 26, 2015

The Brothers Grimm (2005)

The Brothers Grimm (2005) - Matt Damon (Bourne Trilogy) and Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight) are the Grimm brothers... con men who go from village to village, using the old superstitious lore of the area to pose as hunters of the evil and supernatural... for a price.  But when they are caught out by an occupying French general and his Italian torturer, they are sent to a remote village to debunk an ancient curse that turns out to be all too real.  Directed by Terry Gilliam.

Perhaps I am spoiled by TV shows such as Supernatural and (ironically) Grimm, but there is a way to

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Strictly Ballroom (1992)

Strictly Ballroom (1992) - Young ballroom dance competitor Scott Hastings (Paul Mercurio, Exit to Eden) wants to shake up the traditional mindset of the Australian Pan Pacific Championships and dance his own way, but everyone is against him.  When beginner Fran (Tara Morice, Moulin Rouge!) asks to be his partner, he sees his chance... but can the ugly duckling be turned into a swan in time?

This weekend was a musical marathon in the house... it's been raining for three straight days, again, and so naturally I started with Singing in the Rain, segued into High School Musical, and finished up with Moulin Rouge!... but only up to the happy "ending".  So this morning I decided to give Strictly Ballroom a try.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Predestination (2014)

Predestination (2014) -  Ethan Hawke (The Purge) stars in this movie about a time-travelling agent, sent to stop a bomber killing thousands.  Based on the short story "All You Zombies" by Robert Heinlein.

I will try to keep this as spoiler-free as possible for those of you who haven't read the source material, while trying to get across my one, main big problem with this movie.  To do this, I will reference another time-traveling movie to get my point across.  Let me tell you a little story...

In the '80s, I read a book, then watched a movie called "Somewhere in Time" starring Christopher Reeve and Jane Seymour.  In this movie, Reeve is at a party when an old woman gives him a watch and whispers

Monday, March 23, 2015

Not Another Happy Ending (2013)

Not Another Happy Ending (2013) - Writer Jane Lockhart (Karen Gillan, Doctor Who, Oculus) finally sells her first novel and signs a two-book deal with indie publisher Tom Duval (Stanley Webber, The Swimming Trunks), meets screenwriter Willie (Henry Ian Cusick, LOST) and becomes happy.  So happy, she can't finish her second book.  Tom decides to swoop in with the help of flatmate Roddy (Iain De Caestecker, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.) and make her miserable again.  So she can write.  It has nothing to do with the fact that he might be in love with her, right?

Setting aside the obvious pitfalls of a writer writing about an aspiring writer writing, this movie is

Friday, March 20, 2015

Granny Squares

Granny Squares: 20 Crochet Projects with a Vintage Vibe by Susan Pinner -  My daughter has been begging for a bedspread afghan in the eye-bleeding combination of neon yellow and neon pink.  The fastest way for me to accomplish that is with the ever-popular "granny square" blanket.  I tried one once when I re-created Lafayette's afghan from "True Blood" but I made the unfortunate decision to make it with superwash wool.  Superwash, while easy to care for, doesn't grip or react the way regular wool does.  It stretches when wet and can actually slip ends no matter how convolutedly you weave them back into your work.

In short, I ended up with a $150 (in materials, not counting the hours I put into it) blanket that was

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Dream House (2011)

Dream House (2011) - The less you know about the plot ahead of time, the more you will like this movie.

Daniel Craig (Quantum of Solace) stars in this psychological thriller/murder mystery.  Will finds out that his house was the site of a gruesome murder five years ago.  In order to protect his wife Libby (Rachel Weisz, The Lovely Bones), and their two daughters, Will Atenton digs into the house's mysterious past.

Sometimes billed as a ghost story, sometimes just a psychological thriller, there are plenty of red herrings in the first half hour that give you the impression that it is both.  In a way, it *is* both.  And

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

In A World... (2013)

In A World... (2013) - Lake Bell (No Strings Attached) writes, directs and stars in this story about an underachieving voice coach and voice-over artist trying to break the gender barriers of the business.

Carol Solomon is a vocal actor who has a hard time finding work "because she's a chick" despite the fact that her father is a Lifetime Achievement winner in the business.  Tensions run high when she, her father, and the guy she's dating are all up for a job on an important quadrilogy trailer that may decide who will be the next go-to movie trailer voice.

Part romantic comedy, part mockumentary, this movie was a awkward look at voice-acting in L.A.  Part

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Dark House (2009)

Dark House (2009) - Part of the Fangoria Frightfest series, this horror film plays out the story of Claire (Meghan Ory, "Once Upon a Time"), a young actress who survived a horrific event at Darrode House fourteen years ago.  Haunted House magnate Walston Ray (Jeffrey Combs, "Reanimator", "Star Trek Deep Space Nine") is looking to turn Darrode House into his latest award-winning

Monday, March 16, 2015

The Omega Man (1971)

The Omega Man (1971) - Charlton Heston (Soylent Green) stars in this adaptation of the novel "I Am Legend" by Richard Matheson.  This novel is the same inspiration for the Wil Smith movie by the same name.  Matheson has been quoted as saying that the movie was so far removed from the book that it didn't even bother him.

A devastating skirmish where China and Russia used germ warfare has wiped out the majority of the planet.  These "cilia" take an ordinary human and somehow make them diseased albinos... some slowly, some nearly instantly, depending on the patient.  The tagline reads "The last man alive is not alone!".  That is an inaccurate statement, considering.  He's actually the last uninfected man, and there's a few regular humans still very much alive... they're just all infected.  Heston is searching for the nest of infected humans by day, and holed up in his old apartment by night.  When he meets Lisa played by Rosalind Cash (Klute, General Hospital), he discovers that not only are there humans, but quite a few children who are just plain immune to the disease.  What follows is his attempts to find a cure and save what's left of the human race.

The first on-screen interracial kiss was on the original Star Trek series in 1963.  This movie was eight years later, and it seems the studios got over their reluctance in that time.  This film is rated PG.  The

Friday, March 13, 2015

Crochet One-skein Wonders

Crochet One-skein Wonders - In the world of knit and crochet, there are always crafters with one or two oddball skeins of yarn that go unused... they bought more than was needed for a project, found an adorable color in a sale bin they couldn't resist, etc.  And then there are the frugal crafters who love crafting, but hate the hefty price tag... decent soft yarn for the average women's sweater can cost anywhere from $30 to $120 and up, depending on the fiber content.  Sure, you could make a sweater out of the cheap

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Barefoot (2014)

Barefoot (2014) - Jay (Scott Speedman, Underworld) is the black sheep of a well-to-do New Orleans family, gambling, boozing, fighting, and sleeping his way across Los Angeles.  He's mopping floors in a mental hospital as a condition of his parole.  Desperate for money to repay debts to some seriously criminal people, he decides to go home for his little brother's wedding to hit up the family.  When Daisy (Evan Rachael Wood, Across the Universe), who's lived her entire life as a shut-in with her mother follows him out of the institution, he decides to pass her off as his girlfriend.

Despite the potential for endlessly offbeat humor, this movie was actually

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Olympus Has Fallen (2013)

Olympus Has Fallen (2013) - A group of militant Koreans attempting to get the US out of the middle of their decades-long civil war attack the White House and take hostages in the building's underground bunker.  America's only hope lies with former Secret Service agent Mike Banning (Gerard Butler, 300, Timeline).

I served in the US Military.  I am a die-hard patriot, but sometimes... sometimes Hollywood's use of patriotic themes, symbolism and fanfare piss me right the fuck off.  They're like children waving around the flag... they know it can make

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Chef (2014)

Chef (2014) - A multi-star cast heats things up with this honest movie about a chef who self-destructs on social media.

Jon Favreau (Iron Man, Friends) is twitter-clueless chef Carl Casper who gets in

Monday, March 9, 2015

I, Frankenstein

I, Frankenstein (2014) - The most recent adaptation (if you can call it that) of Mary Shelley's novel stars Aaron Eckhart (The Dark Knight) as Adam, Frankenstein's monster, and Yvonne Strahovski (Chuck, Dexter) as Dr. Terra Wade, the unwitting human scientist tasked with animating thousands of human bodies for the demonic side of an ancient war between gargoyles and demons.

I really should not have enjoyed this movie as much as I did.  While the CGI effects were amazing eye candy that brought to mind my delight on seeing the effects of "Blade" for the first time, the story itself was filled with the trite,

Friday, March 6, 2015

Icelandic Handknits

For a while there in the early 20-teens, I was on a sort of quest for heritage knitting techniques.  Lacking a true history of my own heritage, I was investigating a lot of different methods from several different countries.  Icelandic Handknits was one of my attempts to learn true old-world techniques.  Unfortunately it was not the right type of book for that.

Don't get me wrong... this hardcover volume is gorgeous, and the author did a lot

Thursday, March 5, 2015

The Answer Man (2009)

The Answer Man (2009) - Arlen Faber (Jeff Daniels, The Newsroom, Independence Day)  is a reclusive author who wrote a bestselling spirituality book twenty years ago.  Elizabeth (Lauren Graham, Gilmore Girls) is a new chiropractor and single mom trying to make a fresh start.  Kris (Lou Taylor Pucci, The Evil Dead (2013)) is an alcoholic fresh out of rehab with a struggling used book store.  When their lives come together, they help each other in ways no-one could have imagined.

I wanted to take a break from the ghost stories and sci-fi and try a romantic comedy.  What I didn't realize is that I had watched this years ago, but it was still cute and heartwarming on a second viewing.  It's odd to find a romantic comedy

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

The Awakening (2011)

The Awakening (2011) spins the tale of Florence Cathcart (Rebecca Hall, Transcendence), a turn-of-the-century ghost-debunker.  Set in the lush history of post-war England, she travels to a boarding school where a student has died... supposedly scared to death by a ghost.

Florence travels to an old house that has been converted to a boy's boarding school.  There she has assistance from the housemistress and one of the staff, Robert Mallory (Dominic West, John Carter) in catching the perpetrators of the ghost hoax.  Is it some of the children playing pranks, or is there something more sinister afoot?

This is a richly-textured movie, and definitely gothic in the strictest definition of
the term.  Think of Downton Abby and then imagine holding a seance with legitemate results in the dining room, and you might get an idea of the

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Housebound (2014)

Housebound is the story of Kylie, a drug user who gets busted while trying to rob an ATM with what I assume is her boyfriend.  She's sentenced to eight months of house arrest in her childhood home with her mother and step-father.  There's a problem... the house might be haunted.

I found this movie to be absolutely brilliant due to a lot of factors.  The acting is

Monday, March 2, 2015

Stranded (2013)

Stranded (2013) - This movie is proof that just because Christian Slater (Broken Arrow, My Own Worst Enemy) and Brendan Fehr (Roswell, CSI: Miami) are in it, doesn't mean that it's automatically going to be any good.  I had to add a new count category to my review process... the "eyeroll" count.  There were plenty going on here.

Stranded is the story of four moonbase inhabitants who end up with a crapload of problems starting with a meteor shower and subsequent alien infestation... from spores.